Creeps Records

The Martinis - Hung Over

2011-05-10T23:40:00.002-04:00

A fine pioneering entry in that great lost genre of vomit-lounge.

The Martinis - Hung Over (YouTube)

Mamie Perry - I'm Hurted

2011-04-27T00:08:00.000-04:00

Now this old musty stanky 45 is some lowdown Creeps-style music. Mamie Perry has a great blues voice, but this "Gus Jenkins Orchestra" backing band is out of key with her and out of key with themselves. The slow spacious plodding style of the song, combined with the band's atonal ineptitude, gives the whole thing a sort of exotica feel. Is that a zither I hear in there? And UFO sounds? What?

"I'm hurted" sounds like something one of the Family Circus kids would say, doesn't it?

Mamie Perry - I'm Hurted (YouTube)

Jackie Riggs - His Gold Will Melt

2011-04-26T15:50:00.003-04:00

Here's a real puzzler. Can't find out much about this guy except that some have called him a "doo-wop" or "Northern soul" artist. But this weirdo song sounds like Tony Bennett backed up by the freaky elves in Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.

Curiously, the intro is a dead-ringer for They Might Be Giants' "Lie Still Little Bottle", and it makes reference to having a TV set in every room long before the Monkees' "Pleasant Valley Sunday".

Jackie Riggs - His Gold Will Melt (YouTube)

Johnny Fever - Zombie

2011-03-25T00:04:00.000-04:00

WTF is this? It's a work of beauty, but WTF is it? Too weird to be normal, yet too straight-ahead serious and groovin' to be dismissed as a novelty tune. Fantastic fuzztone soul, the likes of which doesn't pass through these woods too often. And the Gene Simmons-esque growled "YEAH!!" is the icing on the fairy cake.

Johnny Fever - Zombie

Jeffrey Scott Holland - Pig-Bristle Brush

2010-10-21T10:43:00.002-04:00

It's guaranteed to make your hair stand straight up like one. Or your money back. Or maybe not. Oh, just click here.

The Kentuckians - Gone Fishin'

2010-09-28T10:52:00.003-04:00

I got my pole and my bucket of worms
I'm gonna live on my own terms
I ain't puttin' up with none of your lip
I'm gonna fly-fish and eat tater chips

I'm gone fishin' in Berea and I might be gone for awhile.

Gone Fishin', Gone Fishin', Gone Fishin,
I'm gone fishin' in Berea and I might be gone for awhile.

I got my line and I got a hook
Come on and join me honey if you can cook
I'm a fisherman extraordinaire
Come with me to Owsley Fork with if you dare

I'm gone fishin' in Berea and I might be gone a long time.

Gone Fishin', Gone Fishin', Gone Fishin,
I'm gone fishin' in Berea and I might be gone for awhile.

The Kentuckians - Gone Fishin' (YouTube)

Surapon - Duang Jai

2010-09-22T17:57:00.004-04:00

This is... well, it's... see, this guy is really.... uh... hmmm. I can't even begin. Just watch it. And watch the whole thing. And let us ask ourselves, could this possibly be the same man responsible for intergalactic novelty smash hit "Ding Dong"?

Surapon - Duang Jai (YouTube)

Grillo's Vanilla Extract Sorcerers - I Will Always Love You

2010-09-20T13:45:00.004-04:00

Yes, why not invite Grillo the Clown to your next wedding?

(Not in person, mind you, that would be the mother of all bad ideas. I still have nightmares about the time I hired him to be "entertainment" at my art exhibition Clowns in Love in NYC in 2005.)

The Old Order of Transylvania Gentlemen have pledged a FREE CASE OF BEER to any couple who plays Grillo's charmingly radioactive rendition of Dolly Parton's "I Will Always Love You" at their wedding. Contact them for details!

Grillo's Vanilla Extract Sorcerers - I Will Always Love You (YouTube)

Retrovirus & Opportunistic Infection (RV&OI) - Pork Factory

2010-09-16T11:44:00.003-04:00

Recorded inside a stinky old abandoned Fischer's meat plant in Louisville, RV&OI's "Pork Factory" is sure to follow in the footsteps of their previous Creeps classics like "Noctural Fridge Party", "Dry Stand Pipe", "Do Not Use Acid to Clean this Brick", and "This Table Smells Like Bleach". The lyrics are hard to suss out through the low fidelity, but it seems to start out this way:

I'm sweatin' like a stuck pig in a 'bandoned sausage factory.
I'm sweatin' in here, just OI and me, RV.
The paint's probably lead and it's peelin' off the walls from another century.
I'm spielin' and squealin' and playin' guitar and sweatin' like a stuck P-O-R-K pig.

P-O-R-K pig, P-O-R-K pig, P-O-R-K pig.

RV&OI - Pork Factory (YouTube)

The Smacks! - Backstage Pass (Rough Unfinished Mix)

2010-09-04T19:51:00.003-04:00

The Smacks! have let leak an early unfinished recording from their long-awaited next album! The song is called "Backstage Pass", and we think it's their best work yet (although we're obviously biased). The song is now available on "Transylvania Colony", the official YouTube channel for the Old Order of Transylvania Gentlemen - take a listen...

The Smacks! - Backstage Pass (Rough Unfinished Mix) (YouTube)

Blind Willie McTell - Lay Some Flowers on my Grave

2010-08-13T15:52:00.003-04:00

When you hear that coughing sound
You'll know McTell is in the ground
Hot mama, lay some flowers on my grave

Blind Willie McTell - Lay Some Flowers on my Grave (YouTube)

مقام رست ١ - محمد القبانجي

2010-07-16T20:21:00.002-04:00

مقام الرست من اداء الاستاذ محمد القبنجي مع اعضاء الفرقه الموسيقيه العراقيه (يوسف بتو، صالح شميل، ابراهيم صالح، يهودا شماس، يوسف زعرور الصغير، عزوري هارون العواد) في مؤتمر القاهره الاول للموسيقى العربيه في مصر عام ١٩٣٢. الشعر تخميس للشاعر السيد جعفر الحلي النجفي (١٨٦١-١٨٩٨) لقصيدة العلاّمة السيد محمد سعيد الحبوبي (١٨٤٩-١٩١٦

يا يوسف الحسن فيك الصب قد ليما * و لو رأوك هَووا للأرض تعظيما
بمن حباك فنون الحسن تتميما * لُحْ كوكباً وامشِ غُصناً والتفتْ ريما
فإن عداك آسمُها لـم تَعْدُك السِّيمـا

Muhammad al-Qubbanchi - Maqam Rast, part 1 (YouTube)

Jim Jackson - I Heard the Voice of a Pork Chop

2010-07-13T22:21:00.006-04:00

In a perfect world, this 1927 recording would be on every Waffle House jukebox, people would sing it instead of the national anthem at ball games, and muzak versions of it would play in elevators. The concept of a talking pork chop is surreal enough, but it gets better - this one's actually quoting Matthew 11:28.

Jim Jackson - I Heard the Voice of a Pork Chop (YouTube)

Lud Gluskin - Ice Cream

2010-06-07T12:44:00.004-04:00

Some enterprising souls have posted a flotilla of Lud Gluskin records to YouTube, and here's one of our very favorites - the original source of the phrase "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream," still uttered today by people who are clueless that its origin lies in this once-popular tune. Other versions were recorded by Harry Reser, Fred Waring, Chris Barber and there's also a piano roll of it done by one Alex Taylor.

(Not to mention the great scene in Down By Law with Roberto Benigni, Tom Waits, and John Lurie.)

Gluskin, born in Russia in 1898, recorded over 700 songs in the 1920s and 1930s. He went on to be the musical director for CBS television. He retired in the 1960s, after directing incidental musical scores for TV shows such as The Twilight Zone, Gunsmoke, and Perry Mason.

Lud Gluskin - Ice Cream (YouTube)

Ho Mei Fan - China Night

2010-06-02T07:39:00.000-04:00

According to this site:

When I first arrived in Korea I was told the most popular song there was "China Night". This was a Japanese song that was picked up by the GI's on R&R and brought back to Korea. All you hear on this site is the melody. The words, in japanese sound like: "she has no yoyo". When I moved to Japan a year later it was still popular. I found this music on a Japanese site of old popular songs. It was titled as: "The Night of China" or in japanese: "Shina No Yoru". The japanese character for the letter "r" is pronounced not as we would but has a softer sound so the word "yoru" does sound a bit like yoyo.

The original provider of this track to the Internet Archive didn't know the vocalist, but a commenter on the post positively identified it as Ho Mei Fan and the Columbia Orchestra and also provided the lyrics:

Minato no akari murasaki no yo ni
Noboru Junk no yume no fune
Ah-ah wasurare nu kokyu no ne-e
Shina no yoru yume no koru

Shina no yoru Shina no yoru yo
Yanagi no madoni rantan yurete
Aka torikago Shina Musume
Ah-ah yarusenai-i ai no utah
Shina no yora yume no yoru

Shina no yoru Shina no yoru yo
Kimi matsu yoi wa obashima no ame ani
Hana mo chiru chiru beni mo chiru
Ah-ah wakarete mo wasuraryoh ka
Shina no yoru yume no yoru

Ho Mei Fan - China Night (mp3)

Vassar Girls Quartet - Kentucky Babe

2010-05-31T21:15:00.006-04:00

Composed by Adam Geibel and Richard Henry Buck in 1896, this obscure tune was recorded by the Vassar Girls Quartet on an Edison Cylinder in 1907. To the novice ear, its melody may sound nebulous and impenetrably cornball - and, well, it really sort of is - but stay with it for the duration of the recording and see if its haunting ethereal tones don't reach you on some level. I can still hear it in my head hours after listening to it, and how often can you say that about a cylinder recording?

Vassar Girls Quartet - Kentucky Babe (mp3)

The New Orleans Owls - Meat On The Table

2010-04-27T22:22:00.005-04:00

According to Wikipedia:

The New Orleans Owls (active 1922-29) were an early jazz band from New Orleans that descended from The Invincibles String band and recorded 18 sides for Gennett Records and 23 sides for Columbia Records from 1925 to 1927 on 78 rpm Gramophone record. They are reportedly the first group to record by the electric system operating from a mobile recording van. They played principally for the dancers in the ballroom of the Hotel Roosevelt (also Roosevelt Hotel) in New Orleans. Little is known about the members, which included Bill Padron (very much in the Paul Mares school) (ct), Benjie White (cl,as,leader), Lester Smith (ts), Mose Farrar (p), Rene Gelpi (bjo,g), Dan LeBlanc (tu), Earl Crumb (d), Frank Netto (tb), Pinky Vidacovitch (cl,as) and Sigfre Christensen (p).

The New Orleans Owls - Meat On The Table (mp3)

Seven Gallon Jug Band - Wipe 'em Off

2010-04-01T21:58:00.006-04:00

One of Clarence Williams' many projects, the Seven Gallon Jug Band did this daffy ditty back in 1929 in New York City.

Seven Gallon Jug Band - Wipe 'em Off (mp3)

Ferdinand Himmelreich - "Lucia" Sextet

2010-03-11T08:23:00.004-05:00

There's little information about Ferdinand Himmelreich online, although I did find something that mentions a "brief biography" of him in the October 1989 issue of In The Groove magazine.

Though Himmelreich is a mystery, the piece he chose for this recording is not. It's from the opera Lucia di Lammermoor by Gaetano Donizetti. Though the opera premiered on September 26, 1835 in Naples, it languished in relative obscurity until the 20th century, when Enrico Caruso recorded a popular version (in 1908), Walt Disney used it in his animated Make Mine Music! (in 1946), and Maria Callas instigated a full-scale revival of it (in 1952). Himmelreich's recording is from the 1920s.

The Three Stooges, or someone on their production team, must have loved the piece - it's used in two of their films (Micro-Phonies and Squareheads of the Round Table).

Ferdinand Himmelreich - Lucia Sextet (mp3)

Matson's Creole Serenaders - 'Taint Nobody's Biz-ness If I Do

2010-02-16T23:25:00.004-05:00

According to Red Hot Jazz: "Charles A. Matson was an African-American pianist and arranger who was very active in New York during the mid-twenties. He accompanied various blues singers as a pianist, including Mamie Smith and Clara Smith. Besides these two songs on the Edison label his other records were released under the names of Matson's Lucky Seven which was recorded for the Paramount label in January of 1924 and Ted Claire's Snappy Bits Band for Gennett in January of 1923."

Matson's Creole Serenaders - 'Taint Nobody's Biz-ness If I Do (mp3)

Luis Russell & His Orchestra - The (New) Call of the Freaks

2010-02-12T20:36:00.004-05:00

In this 1929 document lay the future of the rest of the century. The Cramps in particular were influenced by the magickal memes Luis Russell's New Orleans combo wrought - listen and you'll see why. Other related Russell records worth waxing: "Garbage Man Blues", "Ghost of Freaks", "Primitive", "Hokus Pocus", "After Hour Creep", "Feelin' the Spirit", "Freakish Blues" and a cover of the suicide anthem "Gloomy Sunday".

Luis Russell & His Orchestra - The (New) Call of the Freaks (mp3)

Vernian Process - "Behold the Machine" LP

2010-01-14T22:13:00.002-05:00

Steampunk band Vernian Process is releasing early mixes of their upcoming album Behold the Machine for FREE online. According to a statement released on Dieselpunks:

Vernian Process is proud to announce the pre-release version of our album "Behold the Machine". Featuring 14 tracks of Steamwave goodness. At this time, the album will only be available in digital download format but the download is free. The pre-release mix will differ only in a few minor ways from the final mix. For one, we haven't completely mastered the album, and a few songs need some minor tweaks to sound the way we intended them to. But other than that, this is pretty damn close to what the final album is going to sound like.

Vernian Process - Behold the Machine LP (zip file)

Ernst Albert Couturier - Lullaby from "Jocelyn"

2010-01-13T12:10:00.006-05:00

This is the lullaby from Jocelyn, the opera by Benjamin Godard (pictured above), as performed by Cornetist Ernst Albert Couturier. Recorded in 1916 and released as Edison Blue Amberol #2929.

Though Couturier seemed destined for greatness - he was a musical child prodigy despite being half blind, classically trained at the New England Conservatory, and went on to perform at the St. Louis World Fair in 1904. But he made some errors in judgment, such as turning down a chance to join John Philip Sousa's band, and was reluctant to do much recording at a time when making records was propelling nobodies to fame. By the 1920s he had drifted into the Vaudeville scene, and eventually had a mental breakdown. He died insane in the Harlem Valley Psychiatric Center in Wingdale, N.Y.

He's perhaps best remembered today because his name is inscribed on many an antique high school band cornet floating around amongst collectors. Couturier filed many patents on conical-bore improvements he'd made to wind instruments.

Ernst Albert Couturier - Lullaby from "Jocelyn" (mp3)

Lloyd Shakespeare's New Piccadilly Band - Roll Away Clouds

2009-12-29T00:37:00.002-05:00

According to breda.uk.com:

Lloyd Shakespeare, a trumpet virtuoso, was born on 6 June 1895 in Leytonstone, London. He led his own bands during the twenties, recording for the Edison Bell Winner, Parlophone and Piccadilly labels and became a top session and side man with many of the great bands of the 30's, under amongst others, Lew Stone, Arthur Lally, Jack Harris, Sydney Lipton, Ronnie Munro, and Cecil Norman. He died in 1963.

Lloyd Shakespeare's New Piccadilly Band - Roll Away Clouds

El Trio Cubano - La Bella Cubano

2009-12-26T00:16:00.000-05:00

A fine example of Cuban Habanera music, recorded September 18, 1924 by El Trio Cubano for Edison Records.

El Trio Cubano - La Bella Cubano

The Westbrook Conservatory Entertainers - Silent Night

2009-12-25T23:37:00.006-05:00

Paramount 3197, recorded in October 1929. A mostly instrumental (with some humming) version of the Christmas carol, featuring steel guitar. John James Westbrook, Jr. on vocals/steel guitar, his wife Blanche Westbrook on vocals/guitar, and an unidentified male vocalist joining on the humming.

Lots more info about Westbrook here and here.

The Westbrook Conservatory Entertainers - Silent Night

Seven Wild Men - The Lunatic's Lullaby

2009-12-13T21:14:00.005-05:00

Yet another one of Harry Reser's gazillion pseudonymous bands. Recorded in 1926 for the Harmony label.

Seven Wild Men - The Lunatic's Lullaby

Russian Red Army Choir - It's A Long Way To Tipperary

2009-12-10T23:38:00.006-05:00

Plenty more Moscow madness here and here and here and here, Comrade.

Russian Red Army Choir - It's A Long Way To Tipperary

Jazz-O-Harmonists - I Ain't Never Had Nobody Crazy Over Me

2009-11-30T00:53:00.003-05:00

Gotta love anything that has a hyphenated O in the middle of it. Like Bit-O-Honey. And Malt-O-Meal. And the Jazz-O-Harmonists.

This is actually one of many recordings done under pseudonyms by the secretly prolific Louis Katzman Orchestra. Not sure why, but Louis and his band performed and recorded under many other monickers. Perhaps they were on the run from bill collectors.

Other names for the band include: Whittall's Anglo-Persians, The Castillians, Louis Katzman's Colonial Orchestra, the Atlantic Dance Orchestra, and the Brunswick Salon Orchestra.

Jazz-O-Harmonists - I Ain't Never Had Nobody Crazy Over Me

The Badgers - Wedding of the Painted Doll

2009-11-18T20:28:00.004-05:00

From the 1929 film The Broadway Melody, the first sound film to win an Academy Award for Best Picture, and one of the first musicals to feature a Technicolor sequence. Unfortunately, the Technicolor sequence is presumed lost nowadays and only a black and white copy survives of the complete film.

The film spawned several sequels: Broadway Melody of 1936, Broadway Melody of 1938, Broadway Melody of 1940, and Broadway Melody of 1944 which was retitled to Broadway Rhythm.

The Badgers - Wedding of the Painted Doll

Ace Brigode and his Fourteen Virginians - Oklahoma Indian

2009-11-06T23:42:00.003-05:00

I have a penchant for "Indian"-themed songs. Here's a goodie from 1923. I'm not sure I hear fourteen musicians in this band though. Maybe some of the Virginians went out for a smoke break.

Ace Brigode and his Fourteen Virginians - Oklahoma Indian

Salt And Pepper - Crazy Blues

2009-10-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

Not to be confused with Salt n' Pepa, this is an old-timey ukelele combo who recorded this 78 on July 14, 1924.

Salt And Pepper - Crazy Blues

Pope Leo XIII - Ave Maria

2009-10-28T07:06:00.003-04:00

Recorded not long before his death in 1903, this is a snippet of Pope Leo XIII performing the Ave Maria.

Pope Leo XIII - Ave Maria

Snip and Snap - M`n Weekend Huisje

2009-10-21T01:29:00.002-04:00

Snip and Snap (aka Willy Walden and Piet Muyselaar) were a Dutch crossdressing comedy act popular in the Netherlands between 1937 and 1977. Read more about them here.

Snip and Snap - M`n Weekend Huisje

Indestructible Military Band - The Liberty Bell March

2009-10-20T23:06:00.004-04:00

I got all excited about the name of this band until I realized it referred to their record label, Indestructible Records. I had previously been imagining a group of metallic bulletproof robotic automatons dressed in marching-band gear. Dash it all.

Fans of a certain British comedy troupe may recognize this melody.

Indestructible Military Band - The Liberty Bell March

Bob Skyles and his Skyrockets - Ghost Of The St. Louis Blues

2009-10-11T23:13:00.004-04:00

This obscure Western Swing band from Texas lays down a really primitive and ill-rehearsed version of the perenially spooky Emmett Miller classic. Love it.

Bob Skyles and his Skyrockets - Ghost Of The St. Louis Blues

The Grinnel Giggers - Duck Shoes Rag

2009-10-04T23:32:00.003-04:00

The Grinnel Giggers were a rural band from the Missouri-Arkansas border, near an inlet from the Mississippi River named Big Lake. The band took its name from a type of fishing done in the Big Lake area. Locals would find in these pools a "trash fish" known as Grinnel (also known as Bowfin), and they would "gig" them in the same way that one would go frog-gigging.

The Grinnel Giggers made only eight recordings, all done in one session in Memphis, May 1930.

The Grinnel Giggers - Duck Shoes Rag

Old Ireland Quartette - The Star of Munster

2009-09-26T23:32:00.004-04:00

A Google search for these guys only brought up the Internet Archive entry from which this file is sourced. The text there says:

Irish bagpipes, fiddle, flute, and cello. Beltona label. The lineup here is William Andrews, pipes, James Cawley, flute, and Frank O'Higgins, fiddle, backed by the cello (name unknown), which along with Andrews's chugging on his regulators gives a quite unique sound. Cawley and O'Higgins also recorded with piper James Ennis in the Fingal Trio, one recording of which is on this site. A 78 of Andrews is featured here as well. Andrews and Ennis both learned from the same old piper, Nicholas Markey, but developed somewhat different styles.

Old Ireland Quartette - The Star of Munster

Henny Hendrickson's Louisville Serenaders - My Future Just Passed

2009-09-23T21:12:00.005-04:00

Like Johnny Hamp's Kentucky Serenaders, this is apparently a Pennsylvania band that for unknown reasons chose to bill themselves as Kentuckians.

Henny Hendrickson's Louisville Serenaders were reportedly a territory band, one of the several combos that Hendrickson led in the general vicinity of the crux of the Pennsylvania, New Jersey and Delaware borders. Although totally forgotten today, they obviously were a well-trained orchestra.

Most personnel is unknown. According to sketchy online info, purportedly part of the lineup is: Henny Hendrickson (leader, clarinet, soprano and alto saxophone); Eddie Friebel (tenor saxophone); Lew Quadling (piano and arranger) and Ditter Haynes (banjo and guitar).

Can't find any images of Henny, so here's a photo of a 1927 Buick Model 28 Standard.

Henny Hendrickson's Louisville Serenaders - My Future Just Passed

Alfred Cortot - Ravel's Piano Concerto for Left Hand

2009-09-17T00:02:00.001-04:00

Alfred Cortot, born September 26, 1877, was a Franco-Swiss pianist and conductor. So saith Wikipedia:

Controversially, he supported the German occupation in France during the Second World War (he played in Nazi-sponsored concerts, for example), serving as High Commissioner of the Fine Arts for the Vichy regime[1], and befriending Hitler's friend, architect, and (after 1942) Minister of Armaments and War Production Albert Speer[citation needed]. His Vichy connections, in particular, led to him being declared persona non grata after the Liberation. The motives for his wartime activities have been disputed; they may have arisen from nothing more than his lifelong championship of Teutonic musical culture. Moreover his wife, Clothilde Breal, daughter of the linguist, Michel Breal, was of Jewish origin and Clothilde Breal's cousin, Lise Bloch, was married to Léon Blum, the first Jew to become President du Conseil or Prime Minister in France. Cortot and the Blums maintained a close friendship. At any rate, he was banned from performing publicly for a year and his public image in France suffered greatly (though he continued to be well received as a recitalist in other countries, notably Italy and England).

Wikipedia also goes on to say: "In his early years (approx. 1920–1930) Cortot recorded a number of piano rolls for the Aeolian/ Duo-Art company, since 78rpm discs were not always satisfactory in quality or maximum duration of the recording. Once he performed a Liszt Rhapsody weaving his own playing live at the piano with its mechanical reproduction. With eyes closed some critics could not distinguish between the two." I find this idea fascinating.

This selection, Maurice Ravel's "Piano Concerto for Left Hand", was recorded May 12, 1939. Victor 78rpm Album M-629 (15749-15750). Paris Conservatory Orchestra. Charles Munch, conductor. It was expertly digitally remastered for the Internet Archive by F. Reeder.

According to a comment posted on archive-org's entry for it: "I'm interested in Cortot's playing, which sounds at once rich and rough to point of carlessness. I knew someone who met him after a concert. My acquaintance thought it was great, but Cortot was actually weeping, he was so conscious of his short-comings. I guess he blew it politically, too."

Ravel's Piano Concerto for Left Hand came about when specially commissioned by Austrian pianist Paul Wittgenstein, who had lost his right arm during World War I. He nevertheless continued a stellar musical career, and devised many novel techniques, such as pedal and hand-movement combinations, that allowed him to play music that had been previously thought impossible for a one-armed pianist. Ravel, inspired by the technical challenges of the idea, said "In a work of this kind, it is essential to give the impression of a texture no thinner than that of a part written for both hands." Wittgenstein was originally not thrilled by it upon first listen, but after studying it and playing it himself, came to be obsessed by the piece.

Alfred Cortot - Ravel's Piano Concerto for Left Hand

The Farber Sisters - How'd You Like to be my Daddy?

2009-09-16T00:04:00.001-04:00

I know absolutely nothing about the Farber Sisters and have only circumstantial evidence that they even existed. This recording, purportedly from 1918, causes me severe cellular disruption. I dig it.

The Farber Sisters - How'd You Like to be my Daddy?

Shortwave Spy Transmissions

2009-09-13T00:07:00.004-04:00

Heard these before? No? Then you should definitely invest in one of these. Meanwhile, you can check out these mp3 files of classic intelligence-spook secret code shortwave broadcasts.

From The Conet Project's Internet Archive text:

For more than 30 years the Shortwave radio spectrum has been used by the worlds intelligence agencies to transmit secret messages. These messages are transmitted by hundreds of Numbers Stations.

Shortwave Numbers Stations are a perfect method of anonymous, one way communication. Spies located anywhere in the world can be communicated to by their masters via small, locally available, and unmodified Shortwave receivers. The encryption system used by Numbers Stations, known as a one time pad is unbreakable. Combine this with the fact that it is almost impossible to track down the message recipients once they are inserted into the enemy country, it becomes clear just how powerful the Numbers Station system is.

These stations use very rigid schedules, and transmit in many different languages, employing male and female voices repeating strings of numbers or phonetic letters day and night, all year round.

The voices are of varying pitches and intonation; there is even a German station (The Swedish Rhapsody) that transmits a female child's voice!

One might think that these espionage activities should have wound down considerably since the official end of the cold war, but nothing could be further from the truth. Numbers Stations (and by inference, spies) are as busy as ever, with many new and bizarre stations appearing since the fall of the Berlin wall.

Why is it that in over 30 years, the phenomenon of Numbers Stations has gone almost totally unreported? What are the agencies behind the Numbers Stations, and why are the eastern European stations still on the air? Why does the Czech republic operate a Numbers Station 24 hours a day? How is it that Numbers Stations are allowed to interfere with essential radio services like air traffic control and shipping without having to answer to anybody? Why does the Swedish Rhapsody Numbers Station use a small girls voice?

These are just some of the questions that remain unanswered.

150 Recordings of Shortwave Numbers Transmissions

Ludwig Van Beethoven - Marcia Funebre (Symphony No.3)

2009-09-11T00:02:00.002-04:00

Marcia Funebre, the second movement from Beethoven's Symphony No.3 ("Eroica").

From Brunswick 78rpm discs, recorded in 1929. Performed by the Berlin Philharmonic, Hans Pfitzner, conductor. According to whoever posted it to the Internet Archive: "A truly 19th century interpretation - this is probably very much the way it sounded when Wagner or Mahler conducted".

Beethoven - Marcia Funebre (Symphony No.3), Hans Pfitzner, conductor

Gorni Kramer - I Can't Give You Anything But Love

2009-09-09T00:00:00.001-04:00

That's Gorni Kramer seated with accordion in the image above.

Gorni Kramer - I Can't Give You Anything But Love

Paul Specht Orchestra - Chant of the Jungle

2009-09-07T00:43:00.000-04:00

Photo above from Library of Congress archives: Paul Specht (1895-1954) and his Orchestra in a recording studio.

Musicians in the image include Chauncey Morehouse (drummer; holding cymbal), Frank Guarente (trumpeter; next to Morehouse) and Arthur "The Baron" Schutt (pianist; holding a saxophone for some reason, in the middle of the back row). Specht himself is to the far right.

Paul Specht Orchestra - Chant of the Jungle

Melle Boyer de Lafory - Le Prophète

2009-09-06T18:50:00.003-04:00

Who is Melle Boyer de Lafory? I don't know, but this 1910 cylinder recording of her performing a portion of the Giacomo Meyerbeer opera Le Prophète has that certain indefinable something that makes me want to eat Bovril from the jar with a spoon.

Melle Boyer de Lafory - Le Prophète

Aeolian Piano Roll - My Little Maid of Oz

2009-08-22T15:47:00.003-04:00

It's "My Little Maid of Oz", from the bizarre 1902 stage musical production of The Wizard of Oz, played by that magical steampunk-robotic device known as a player piano, from a paper roll dated 1905.

The earliest player piano - that is, an automated piano-playing device that is programmed by interchangeable rolls of perforated paper - was invented by Claude Seytre, who patented one in France in 1842. Evidently the French patent office didn't require a functioning prototype, because although Seytre had the right idea, his machine didn't actually work. It wasn't until 1876 that John McTammany exhibited a working version of the device in Philadelphia.

Aeolian Piano Roll - My Little Maid of Oz (1905)

Maria Von Schmedes - Unter Einem Regenschirm Am Abend

2009-08-15T17:28:00.004-04:00

The obscure Austrian cabaret-schlager singer Maria Von Schmedes singing "Unter Einem Regenschirm Am Abend" (Under an Umbrella in the Evening), a popular German tune that was also performed by Lale Andersen. Maria was born in 1914 in Vienna. Had musical and theatrical training, and performed at the Berlin Philharmonic Concert Hall in 1939. Her biggest hit was "Mein Sonntagsvergnügen" (My Sunday's Pleasure) in 1942.

Maria Von Schmedes - Unter Einem Regenschirm Am Abend

Paul Whiteman & Johnny Hauser - Gloomy Sunday

2009-08-05T01:49:00.006-04:00

In 1933, Rezső Seress composed the song "Szomorú Vasárnap", basing it on a poem written by his friend László Jávor. Javor was depressed because of a breakup with a woman, and it was he who suggested Seress set it to music.

That song was translated into English in 1935 as "Gloomy Sunday", and quickly became a phenomenon as the song was implicated in many subsequent suicides. From the Syracuse Herald, February 2, 1936:

Budapest police have branded the song "Gloomy Sunday" public menace No. 1 and have asked all musicians and orchestras to cooperate in supressing it, dispatches said today.

To its gloomy strains, the police attribute 18 suicides. It was the 18th suicide -- which moved police to action -- when Joseph Keller, a shoemaker, killed himself and in a note to police asked them to put on his grave 100 of the roses mentioned in the song.

Men, women and children are among the victims. Two people shot themselves while gypsies played the melancholy notes on violins. Some killed themselves while listeninig to it on gramophone records in their homes. Two housemaids cut their employers' linens and paintings and then killed themselves after hearing the song drifting up into the servant's hall from dinner parties.

The controversial "Gloomy Sunday" only grew in popularity as it became known as "the Hungarian Suicide Song", and then Billie Holiday rocketed the song to even greater heights of fame when she recorded it in 1941. A list of other important early versions would have to include ones by Pal Kalmar, Josh White, Hal Kemp, Paul Robeson, Artie Shaw and the French chanteuse Damia.

But this version, by Paul Whiteman and his Orchestra with Johnny Hauser on vocals, is one of the better and creepier versions to these ears. Take a listen... but hide the razor blades and sleeping pills.

Paul Whiteman & Johnny Hauser - Gloomy Sunday

Larry Vincent - The Freckle Song

2009-08-04T00:54:00.011-04:00

Born in California, Larry Vincent (no relation to the horror host) moved around the country plying his musicianly trade for many years in many places, including Chicago's Alamo Cafe in 1926 before settling down in Covington, KY in the late 30s, early 40s.

Larry arrived in Northern Kentucky at the peak of its decadent period, when the area was ruled by mobsters, strippers, prostitutes, card sharks, burlesque halls, and other such glorious sleaze. He took up a residency performing at Jimmy Brink's Lookout House, a supper club that was actually a front for an illegal casino. This became Larry's second home for years to come.

He formed Pearl Records, an odd label whose artist roster consisted almost entirely of Larry himself performing under many pseudonyms. This particular recording, "The Freckle Song", is one of his tamer outings, an almost Benny Bell-like novelty song based around rhymes that you think you will go one way but then go another, and the fact that its chorus "She's got freckles on her, but she's nice" sounds rather uncannily like "She's got freckles on her butt, she's nice."

People were easily amused in those days. Other puerile Larry Vincent gems include "I Took My Organ To The Party", "Sarah Sittin' In A Shoe Shine Shop", and "I Grow Gooey over Chop Suey".

Near the end of his life, Larry told radio host Dr. Demento:

At a time when sale or possession of records with the f-word and other indiscretions could get you arrested, I made records that were just risque enough to be slightly scandalous to Middle Americans, yet discreet enough to be acceptable to at least some mainstream record stores.

I did have some regional success as a pop crooner in the 1920s. In the late 1930s I collaborated with several established Tin Pan Alley songwriters. With Henry Tobias and Moe Jaffe I turned out one song that eventually became a semi-standard, "If I Had My Life To Live Over."

Larry Vincent - The Freckle Song

Teddy Brown & His Orchestra - Fairy on the Clock

2009-08-03T02:01:00.003-04:00

The amazing Mr. Creosote lookalike Teddy Brown, displaying his admirable xylophone prowess. This was taken from the soundtrack of the 1930 British film Elstree Calling, co-directed by Alfred Hitchcock. (which makes me wonder about his naming of Gavin Elster in Vertigo...)

Teddy Brown & His Orchestra - Fairy on the Clock

Want even more Fairyclockmania? Check out the Voraxical Theatre blog.

John Lacalle's Band - A Signal from Mars

2009-07-31T00:00:00.001-04:00

A happy little marching tune from a 1901 cylinder. Listening to it, this isn't exactly how I would've imagined this song to sound - especially judging from the wonderful sheet music cover. Perhaps we're meant to imagine the marching bands in the street parades that would be celebrating and commemorating Earth's contact with alien life... just before we get fried and go up in a big fiery puff of klaatu-barada-nikto. We're no baloney Homosapiens, take it back with ya.

John Lacalle's Band - A Signal from Mars

Mira Music Box - Must You?

2009-07-30T00:00:00.001-04:00

So, in 9th century Iraq, the Banū Mūsā brothers invented an automatic musical device which played interchangeable cylinders with raised pins on the surface.

Centuries later, the Swiss popularized the ancient Iraqi invention with their own musical snuff boxes that made sounds when you opened them. The sound was produced by a mechanism plucking tiny metal nibs that made different tones depending on their size and shape. By the 19th century, music boxes had come into their own as a means of song propagation before the advent of phonograph records.

It was through this amazing technology that someone committed this song ("Must You?") to immortality by crystallizing it into tiny metal nibs on a small rotating drum or disc in the 19th century. By 1903, even more amazing technology had come about - the phonograph cylinder. Someone had the bright idea of holding this Mira music box up to the recording horn of an Edison machine, thus making a copy to be preserved and distributed.

But then, much later in the century, someone recorded that cylinder on an amazing technology called magnetic tape, thus making a third-generation copy to be preserved and distributed. A few years later it was probably then transferred to a fourth-generation copy on the next amazing technology called the digital compact disc.

So here's the fifth generation copy, wherein someone used the very latest amazing technology and did away with the need for a physical disc, instead converting it to pure digital binary microscopic quantum beep-bop-blips to be decoded by microchips.

Stay tuned: in a few years, we'll be converting all these old recordings into hyper-dimensional meta-holographic constructs that can be gleaned psychically by anyone in the known universe by uploading them to an interstellar web of microtubular connection via nanodust. Bet me.

The song "Must You?" was written for L. Frank Baum's bizarre 1902 Stage Version of The Wizard of Oz.

Mira Music Box, circa 1903

Seven Foot Dilly - Streak Of Lean, Streak Of Fat

2009-07-29T01:07:00.002-04:00

Ladies and Gentlemen, your friend - and his - the one, the only, the unfathomable recording sensation Seven Foot Dilly on guitar, accompanied by his rotgut-drinkin' buddy A.A. Gray on the fiddle. Recorded March 20, 1930.

Quotations from Chairman Dilly: "I hear music." "Watch him, he taps both feet at the same time." "Boy, he likes his Cincinnati Chicken." "Go Crazy. Ain't gonna live long now."

Seven Foot Dilly - Streak Of Lean, Streak Of Fat

Johnny Hamp's Kentucky Serenaders - Black Bottom

2009-07-25T15:21:00.004-04:00

Johnny Hamp's Kentucky Serenaders cut a lot of great early Jazz records in the 1920s, and constantly toured the USA and England with their Kentucky-themed band. A jazzed-up cover of Stephen Foster's "My Old Kentucky Home" was their signature tune.

Thing is, though, the band weren't Kentuckians, as least as far as we know. There's no evidence that they even played here. Hamp himself was from Lancaster, PA.

The band predated Hamp as The Serenaders, but at some point in the late 1910s he filled in for the band's regular leader (was he from Kentucky, mayhaps?) and ended up staying on permanently. By 1919 they were touring regularly and had renamed themselves Johnny Hamp's Kentucky Serenaders, for reasons that still defy logical explanation - not that any is really needed for the nomenclature of fly-by-night dixieland orchestras.

Their biggest hit was 1926's Black Bottom" (Victor 20101-B) which started a nationwide dance craze that become associated with Kentucky to some extent, despite the apparent lack of actual connection.

From 1931 on they dropped the Kentucky Serenaders name and simply became The Johnny Hamp Orchestra, lasting a few more years before hanging it up for good as World War II loomed on the horizon.

Johnny Hamp's Kentucky Serenaders - Black Bottom

Madame Rombro - Po Oolitza

2009-07-24T00:03:00.001-04:00

Here's a real mystery record. Po Oolitza, by one Madame Rombro, released in 1899 on Edison brown wax cylinder 7179.

A Google search brings up only the Internet Archive entry where I found the mp3, and a reference to the cylinder having been played before on WFMU. And that's it.

As for the song itself, a book called Travels to the seat of war in the East, through Russia and the Crimea in 1829 by Sir James Edward Alexander mentions "the favorite national air of Russia" as being a song that starts with those words (see image above).

Madame Rombro - Po Oolitza

Erhard Bauschke - Blindekuh

2009-07-23T00:09:00.000-04:00

Erhard Bauschke was one of pioneers of German swing music, playing clarinet in the James Kok Tanz-Orchestra, a Berlin band popular for its jazzy interpretations of international hits. The Kok orchestra was dissolved when Kok, along with most of the band's Jewish musicians, were forced to flee to Romania in order to avoid Nazi persecution. Bauschke, together with whatever former members were left, formed his own band. He died in 1945, struck by a speeding motorist in Berlin.

"Blindekuh" is a German children's game in which people are blindfolded and led around.

Erhard Bauschke - Blindekuh

Mikhail Ivanovich Glinka - Kamarinskaya

2009-07-22T16:40:00.004-04:00

Mikhail Ivanovich Glinka (seen above in a painting by Ilya Repin) was a key member of "The Five", a cadre of Russian composers who sought to create a new and specifically Russian kind of art music, rather than one that imitated older European tradition.

This is a 1904 recording of "Kamarinskaya" by Glinka, complete with weird bird noises.

Mikhail Ivanovich Glinka - Kamarinskaya

Diggity Dave and his Cheap Guitar Band - Dead Puppies

2009-06-02T16:59:00.001-04:00

Cover of the infamous 1970s tune from the Ogden Edsl Wahalia Mondo Bizarrio Blues Ensemble Band.

Diggity Dave and his Cheap Guitar Band - Dead Puppies

Harry Pomar and his Hotel Ansley Orchestra - Rainy Days

2009-03-21T10:01:00.003-04:00

Who was Harry Pomar? Was he the same man who wrote this book of songs? And who is listed as "lost" here?

Harry Pomar and his Hotel Ansley Orchestra - Rainy Days

Cheeseburger & Fries - Creeps Is In My Head

2009-03-11T19:54:00.004-04:00

In celebration of the announcement of Jeffrey Scott Holland's upcoming theatrical tour de force Cheeseburger & Fries: The Musical, we bring you a happy tune you'll love to croon.

From the sacred shoebox of Cheeseburger & Fries cassettes comes this nummy nugget, circa 1996, recorded live on "The Pete Hrabak Show", radio station WRFL, Lexington, KY. A little pinch of Son House, a dash of Billy Childish, and a whole lotta Rockcastle County... the breeze in the trees. Singing weird melodies. They nursed it and never rehearsed it. And they made that the start of the Creeps.

Cheeseburger & Fries - Creeps Is In My Head

Vessella's Italian Band - Beethoven's Funeral March

2009-03-06T21:07:00.003-05:00

How long have I been on?

Now here's that swell tune "Vessella's Funeral March" by Beethoven's Italian Band. I think I'll pour me another salad, pally.

How did all you people get in my room?

Vessella's Italian Band - Beethoven's Funeral March

Wendy Williams and the Peter Pan Orchestra - Squee Gee

2009-02-13T19:44:00.003-05:00

From Dave the Spazz on the WFMU blog:

"It wasn't long before Squee Gee and his idiotic theme song solidly possessed all the chambers of my fragile, unblemished coconut. Allegedly flitting about like a careless ne'er do-well, the enigmatic Squee Gee was ascribed the ability to make each day a holiday and I wasn't the doubting type. Squee Gee had his line of jive down tight and who was I to question his upside-down pinwheeled logic? They were starting early--these messianic Manson wannabes in their clown whites and ice cream cone hats. I inspected the grooves of the record and spun it incessantly. That's when I knew that I would either have to kill Squee Gee or be Squee Gee."

Wendy Williams and the Peter Pan Orchestra - Squee Gee

Clifford Hayes' Louisville Stompers - Frog Hop

2009-02-08T21:41:00.003-05:00

A great side by Louisville's own Clifford Hayes, who organized multiple jug bands and jazz bands in the 1920s and 1930a.

Clifford Hayes' Louisville Stompers - Frog Hop

Albert Benzler - Sweet Little Daisies

2009-02-04T09:05:00.002-05:00

Recorded 1905 on an Edison gold moulded cylinder.

Push the little daisies and make them come up.

Albert Benzler - Sweet Little Daisies

Hasil Adkins - KFC

2009-01-31T01:53:00.002-05:00

From the Creeps Records release Night Life comes this classic final entry in Hasil's lifelong tradition of "chicken songs".

Hasil Adkins - KFC

Harry A. Yerkes Dance Orchestra - Mystery

2009-01-29T22:31:00.005-05:00

The Harry A. Yerkes Dance Orchestra is just one of the many ensembles run by Mr. Yerkes, including The Yerkes Marimbaphone Band, Yerkes Jazarimba Orchestra, Yerkes S.S. Flotilla Orchestra, Yerkes Bellhops, The Novelty Five, The Happy Six, etc. This tune, "Mystery, is one of our all-time favorites.

Harry A. Yerkes Dance Orchestra - Mystery

The Original Memphis Five - Snake Hips

2009-01-24T10:10:00.002-05:00

The Original Memphis Five was a New Orleans jazz quintet founded in 1917 by trumpeter Phil Napoleon and pianist Frank Signorelli. The group made many recordings between 1921 and 1931, sometimes under different names, including Ladd's Black Aces and Carolina Cotton Pickers. In 1959 Phil moved to Miami, where he ran a club called "Napoleon's Retreat" where he played for many years.

The Original Memphis Five - Snake Hips

Colonel Sanders - Spanish Flea

2009-01-23T00:12:00.004-05:00

This highly obscure album is ostensibly credited to Colonel Sanders, but I'm not sure just how involved he was with the concept.

Then again, I hear a prominent mandolin, an instrument the Colonel was proficient at (he also released an album with his all-mandolin band), so maybe it really is him and not just a band of studio session hacks earning some quick wine money till their next Herb Alpert gig. I dunno.

This record was originally given away at Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants in the 1960s.

Colonel Sanders - Spanish Flea

Benny Bell - Shaving Cream

2009-01-22T21:41:00.002-05:00

In the late 1970s I heard this old Benny Bell song on the Dr. Demento show, which used to be syndicated to WKQQ-FM at 1am. Even after decades, I could still remember the verses and the dopey tard-waltz sound. I just stumbled upon it on the glorious repository of human knowledge that is archive.org and immediately went into reverie.

There's many other selections from Mr. Bell's recorded oeuvre on there, such as "Noses Run In My Family", "Go Take a Ship for Yourself", "Everybody Wants My Fanny", and "Pink Pills for Pale People"... but I've been too afraid to listen to them.

Benny Bell - Shaving Cream

Kurt Widmann and his Orchestra - In Rio de Janeiro

2009-01-21T11:23:00.006-05:00

Kurt Widmmann (Born March 2, 1906, died Nov. 27, 1954) was an innovative bandleader with a flair for the exotic. Listen to this number, in which we hear a German band playing a faux-Brazilian Tango with a Hawaiian-style slide guitar solo.

He first played the Accordion in early incarnations of his band, and later the trombone. In the early 1930s he had a jazz quintet that played nightly at the Hotel Imperator. The Nazis came down on him about Jewish influences in his repertoire, and Widmann began trying to dodge the Gestapo by using English-sounding aliases like 'Billy Blackmoore' and 'John Webb'.

After World War II, his orchestra found some work in the clubs of the American Sector of Berlin, but never regained their pre-war stature.

Kurt Widmann and his Orchestra - In Rio de Janeiro

Wallace Kiser and his Orchestra - Bumble Boogie

2009-01-20T02:46:00.004-05:00

For years, I've been hoarding 78rpm homemade record acetates that I've found at yard sales and thrift shops, and I decided last year to finally actually play one and digitize it. It was posted for awhile to JSHNYC but so far no one has been able to tell me more about the artist.

Warning: this particular record is really, really, really whipped, but through the static you can hear that it's apparently a 1930's radio broadcast of Wallace Kiser and his Orchestra doing "Bumble Boogie" in the Blue Room of the Downing House, Lexington, KY.

I'm only arbitrarily guessing the spelling is Kiser - it could be Kaiser or Kyser. A Google search surprisingly brings up absolutely nothing for any of these spellings of the artist, nor for the venue. It's like this record came from an alternate universe or something. Anyone have a clue?

Other than pitch-correction, I've done absolutely nothing to this track yet, but with noise reduction and editing tools, I think I can restore it into something marginally listenable. Sooner or later. All in time.

Wallace Kiser and his Orchestra - Bumble Boogie

Lale Andersen - Jonny

2009-01-18T12:38:00.005-05:00

Lale Andersen (March 23, 1905 – August 29, 1972) was a German chanson singer-songwritera born in Bremerhaven, Germany. She is best known for her interpretation of the song "Lili Marleen" in 1939, which became tremendously popular on both sides during the second World War, and ultimately got her in trouble with the Nazi party.

This song, "Jonny", was way ahead of its time, as it sounds like a much later recording than it is. It's listed on the Internet Archive as being public domain. Anyone know more about this song?

Lale Andersen - Jonny

The Memphis Jug Band - Stealin' Stealin'

2009-01-16T19:47:00.003-05:00

One of my all-time favorite songs by this penultimate jug band, recorded on September 15, 1928.

My memory is hazy, but I'm pretty sure that Cheeseburger & Fries performed this a couple times during their 1990s heyday.

The Memphis Jug Band - Stealin' Stealin'

Comedian Harmonists - Wir Sind Von Kopf Bis Fuss Auf Liebe Eingestellt

2009-01-15T01:33:00.004-05:00

An elegant German sextet, five vocalists and a pianist, all dressed in tuxedos, singing everything from Hebrew folk songs to American pop hits of the day. Here, they do a quirky reworking of the Marlene Dietrich classic from The Blue Angel. Also check out tonight's Voraxica blog entry about them.

Comedian Harmonists - Wir Sind Von Kopf Bis Fuss Auf Liebe Eingestellt

Eva Tanguay - I Don't Care

2009-01-13T14:24:00.007-05:00

Right up there with Anita Berber, Olga Desmond and Louise Brooks in our own personal Hall of Fame of wild and wonderful women, there's Eva Tanguay. Not just content to be sexually emancipated in her personal life, she made it the overarching theme of her career with songs like "It's All Been Done Before But Not the Way I Do It," "I Want Someone to Go Wild With Me" and "Go As Far As You Like".

She was infamous for her costumes made of money (dresses created entirely from stitched-together dollar bills, and a coat covered with shiny new pennies for sequins) and her temper (she once threw a stagehand down a flight of stairs during a stay in Louisville, KY).

Aleister Crowley himself saw her act and declared her a genius, "the perfect American artist, starry chaste in her colossal corruption".

Tragically, she made only two films in her entire career (Energetic Eva in 1916 and The Wild Girl in 1917) and but one lone audio recording, which you can hear here:

Eva Tanguay - I Don't Care

Kitty Twister and her Hot Dogs - Kitty Twist (Demo)

2009-01-10T02:11:00.005-05:00

Here's a rare demo track from Kentucky's very own
Miss Kitty Twister and her Hot Dogs, pictured above rockin' in noo yawk city.

Kitty Twister and her Hot Dogs - Kitty Twist (Demo)

Shermia Love - "Nothing Is Ever Really What It Seems"

2008-12-31T01:48:00.003-05:00

Recorded live from the audience during Catclaw Theatre Company's production of Toulouse-inations at the Kentucky Center for the Performing Arts, Saturday, August 9, 2008.

Shermia Love - "Nothing Is Ever Really What It Seems"

Jeffrey Scott Holland - Two Minutes to Tornado

2008-12-27T12:43:00.005-05:00

Comprised entirely of treated found elements, "Two Minutes to Tornado" was released by Jeffrey Scott Holland earlier this year as a teaser for an avant-garde musical project supposedly coming out sometime in 2009 and released solely on the USB Flash Drive format. This is unrelated to his caveman-jazz band The JSH Combo, who also have a new live album scheduled for the Spring.

Jeffrey Scott Holland - Two Minutes to Tornado

The Smacks! - Gentle Be My Bomb

2008-12-26T22:17:00.003-05:00

Here's a classic track from The Smacks!, a glam-garage band from Lexington, KY.

"It’s exactly what would happen if a couple of retarded guys in a Harry Crews novel formed a band in between burning down the barn and fucking a goat in the ass". - Sleazegrinder.com

The Smacks! - Gentle Be My Bomb

Keep Circulating the RV&OI Tapes

2008-12-25T12:15:00.004-05:00

Retrovirus & Opportunistic Infection (RV & OI) were one of the earliest bands to self-identify as "Creeps" music, and since they're still around to this day, they would qualify as the longest-running one. They also have their very own comic book series, albeit it's as simplistic and primitive as their music. We dig 'em.

RV&OI audio files on Archive.org

After years of purveying the finest in low-fi lowbrow atonal warbling from Kentucky street-busking duo Retrovirus and Opportunistic Infection, we've finally decided to enter the 21st century digital age by flooding the market and hopefully glutting cyberspace with these deliciously shitty archival recordings of raw squirming humanity.

Yes, that's right, you heard right, we're putting it ALL out there for FREE, thanks to the scary geniuses at the Internet Archive Open Source Audio Project. That's right, spontaneous street recordings made by manchild losers on a crappy Radio Shack handheld tape recorder in 1989 while chanting whatever nonsense pops into their heads are now available ALL OVER THE WORLD on this here dashed clever "INTERNET" thingie as variable-rate MP3s, zip files, M3U streams, and even OGG Vorbis files.

In true Creeps fashion, never before has so much effort been expended for something so little.

Creeps Records is grateful to the faithful consumers who have actually paid real money over the years for our cassette-only releases, and surely our sister label JLK Records, who compiled some RV&OI material into compact disc releases, feels the same gratitude as well. HOWEVER: it's now the new millenium. Up is down, black is white, day is night. We now want to GIVE AWAY Retrovirus and Opportunistic Infection's corrosively retarded jingles, and to do so aggressively. Your new mission is to take RV&OI's unholy jabberings and FORCE THEM DOWN THE THROATS OF EVERY LIVING BEING ON THIS PLANET. Host these mp3s on your own websites and blogs, or just hotlink to archive.org's versions. Email them to everyone you know. Email them to strangers and ask them to "please pass along". Let's make sure these pieces of sonic shit are so spread across cyberspace that they can never, ever, ever, be undone, and thus insure their magickal grip on this sector of the solar system forevermore. NOTHING YOU EVER DO IN YOUR LIFE WILL BE AS IMPORTANT AS THIS.

Also check here and here and here.

What is "Creeps Music"?

2008-12-24T00:01:00.003-05:00

From the original 1996 "Creeps Headquarters" website, now defunct:

Yeah, late at night in Rockcastle County you hear 'em clonkin' 'n' bangin' on whatever they can find, drunk on cough syrup and mouthwash. They're havin' a good ol' time, even as they're grimly aware of THINGS WHICH YOU DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW ABOUT. Yep, they got the creeps.

"The Creeps" is like "The Blues". Not just a musical genre, it's a feeling, a state of mind. It's that indefinable something that passes ghostly and Neutrino-like between the cracks of your very perception; the stark, gut-wrenching awareness that time is passing.

You had the Creeps when you were a kid. Maybe you still have it now. Maybe it'll come back to haunt you later like a resurrected zombie of your former childhood, returning to check up on you.

From the original 1996 Creeps FAQ:

WHAT IS "THE CREEPS"? According to ancient Kentucky slang, it's a mysterious state of mind, satori-like yet continuous, indefinite yet obvious. JSH says that listening to tapes on his Creeps label is the best way to grasp the concept.

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF CREEPS PRODUCTIONS? Well, primarily to promote the purveyors of musicians and artists who are a part of the Creeps "movement".

WHAT DOES CREEPS MUSIC SOUND LIKE? Usually it's primitive, very low-budget, low-fidelity stuff, Almost always poorly recorded. Contrary to popular belief, however, it is not limited to scratchy rural appalachian voodoo music, although this indeed lies closest to the heart of Creeps. Creeps Music can be as simple and infantile as Central Rock Company or as complex and infantile as Team Latex.

IS THE CREEPS MOVEMENT STRICTLY A KENTUCKY THING? Well, although it is as inherently connected to Kentucky as Zydeco is to Louisiana, there are Creeps artists in other places (such as Scott Armel, Jon Wiening, and most of Shay Quillen's buddies). Many artists are technically recognized as Creeps music even though they've never ever heard of it. (Daniel Johnston, The Tinklers, The Mummies, and Sexton Ming all embody the spirit of the Creeps).

From Mitchell Newport's 2003 essay "That Low Gruesome Sound":

The first modern Creeps album is generally considered to be "Sounds of the Pogo", an extremely low-distribution cassette by a pre-teen Jeffrey Scott Holland in 1974. The album's title refers not to the punk dance - which didn't yet exist - but to a character in a homemade comic book drawn by Holland and Greg Hisle. The star of "The Pogo" comics was a very "Incredible Hulk" type sympathetic monster whose head, bizarrely, resembled Walt Kelly's Pogo Possum. The "music" on the album mostly consisted of some "atmospheric" sounds that was quite industrial-noise before its time. There were also spoken interludes with Hisle, filled with in-jokes (the meaning of which have been long since forgotten). Among the juvenile chatter, however, are references to "the Creeps".

Retrovirus & Opportunistic Infection made their first early primitive recordings around 1976 and continued to record throughout the late 1970s, though their true career didn't really kick in until the early 1980s when they blossomed into the purest of all Creeps bands. The early recordings were heavy on singing along with other musical sources from radio, TV and albums, and also featured predominantly covers of then-popular classic rock songs. A common motif for RV&OI at this time was to try to cover the songs completely straight and serious at first (as best as possible with their extremely limited musical abilities) and then gradually let the song build up to a complete insane rant and freak-out, much in the way that Sam Kinison would do with his cover of "Are You Lonesome Tonight?" many years later (not to mention The Soft Boys' cover of "That's When Your Heartaches Begin".)

The early RV&OI cassettes were all given names like "21 Heavy Hits", "Rock Gold", or "30 Rock N Soul Magic Moments", taking these titles directly from common cheesy K-Tel type compilations of the era. Years later, another Creeps group, The Hartman Band, nodded to this tradition with their album "20 Great Truck Drivin' Songs".

Grillo the Clown - Kiss Me

2008-12-23T23:22:00.001-05:00

Grillo the Clown, famed and fabled street performer from Central Kentucky, here transforms the Sixpence None The Richer hit "Kiss Me" into a stirring anthem of pathos, angst, and terrible beauty.

If you disagree, you'll never get to Heaven.

Grillo the Clown - Kiss Me